Today’s Baby Boomers are aging, and their children, the Gen Xrs and Millennials, are faced with some pretty tough decisions when it comes to doing what’s best for their parents.
In one situation, children may be anxious to be closer to their parents when they understand that the time they have to spend with them is shortening or that they want their own children to know, love, and forge a relationship with their grandparents.
A less inspiring situation comes with realizing your parents aren’t able to live as independently as they had been. In those cases, if you’re the child of parents who is experiencing a decline in their ability to care for themselves adequately, you have to make some hard choices.
Recognizing When Your Parents May Need You
1) They’re paying bills late or not paying them at all
2) Their home appears cluttered and disorganized
3) They are missing doctor’s appointments and forgetting to take meds as scheduled
4) They developed poor dietary habits resulting in a big swing in weight, either up or down
5) You may notice mood swings, they may appear depressed or are losing their temper easily
6) They can't remember things that happened yesterday
These are only a few indicators, but as you more than anyone understand your parents’ normal behavior, you’ll likely notice signs of your own.
If the decline is such that you feel the need for them to move to a more skilled environment is needed, then schedule a time to speak to their family physician for advice on the best options for them locally.
Considering the Move
If you’re able to work from home, then the problem of finding employment is eliminated. And if you’re currently living in a city with a high cost of living, moving near your parents who may live in a city where the cost is less, the move may actually make good financial sense. Other factors may also add to the financial benefits, such as not having to pay for people to come in and do the simple tasks you can do yourself for your parents. These can include making prepared meals, home and lawn maintenance, and rideshare or cabs for visits to doctor appointments or shopping.
Moving closer to your parents is already a huge step, so try removing some of the stress by renting a home or an apartment first. Trying to sell your current home and purchase a new one while possible job searching or looking for assisted living for your parents can feel overwhelming. This is especially true if you’ve never lived in the same city your parent currently resides in or if it’s been a long time since you have lived there.
Finding apartments is easy to do online before you move, and since the financial commitment is less than with buying, you can save the money from the sale of your home and decide later where it makes more sense to invest.
Work and Business Considerations
If you do not currently work remotely, then a job search to find employment near your parents' home can be a challenge. Start early by updating your resume, get the word out everywhere you can, like your social media sites and LinkedIn, and sign up for Job Alerts that let you know when a job that matches your search becomes available.
If you’re a business owner and work from home, make sure your new place has adequate space for a home office. If moving your business means needing to find a new locale, then again, you may wish to consider leasing over buying first. Using a real estate broker is essential for this decision. In addition to the monthly lease payments, the expense for your move and costs like a moving company, moving supplies, and storage needs need to be taken into account. Then, work out a detailed budget before scheduling the move.
Moving to be closer to your parents will take a lot of work, planning, and investment, like housing considerations, job searches, and business moves. But in the end, you won’t regret the time you took to be with them when they needed you most.
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Contributed Article by Laurie Orlov
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